You’ve probably heard the saying that “nice guys finish last.” Generally, I take issue with that idea, but in the case of these particular heroes, I think it’s pretty fitting. Because, unlike all the bright-eyed, virtuous heroes you’ll find in most video games, this list is a bunch of foul-mouthed, violent degenerates.
Don’t get it twisted, though. Sometimes you need a blunt instrument to get the job done, and you can’t always worry about doing things nicely. In which case, this list of naughty guys and gals is just the ticket.
We’ve gathered a bunch of fantastic anti-heroes for this list, including greedy thugs, bloodthirsty mercenaries, foul-mouthed witches, and even horrifying monstrosities. They’re roughly listed according to how well-received their adventures were, though there are some exceptions when necessary.
So grab a stiff drink, get comfortable, and let’s talk about some epic games where nice guys finish last!
Spoilers for many of the games below.
10 Carrion
Tentacles and Teeth
While there’s plenty of not-so-nice guys and girls on this list, our first contender isn’t truly either gender. It’s a horror movie monster desperately trying to grow bigger and stronger so it can escape this human facility.
Nameless and hungry, the monster in Carrion is absolutely not a traditional hero. In fact, in this game, it’s more of a villain, though you could also make the argument that the humans experimenting on it aren’t exactly trustworthy either.
As such, you’ll spend the majority of Carrion gobbling up unsuspecting humans, crawling on walls and ceilings, and using your mutated strength to get farther and farther.
Despite myself, I found I was rooting for the monster the longer I played, and reveling in its gruesome behavior. Maybe it’ll even find some clues as to how it got there in the first place along the way.
9 Wario Land: Shake It!
Greed is Good
When I decided to write this list, I knew I had to include Wario. Sure, he’s not as bloodthirsty or out of control as the others on it, but he’s absolutely a great example of a not-so-traditional hero.
While many of us probably know (and love) Wario for the WarioWare games, he’s also been in several platformers. And Wario Land: Shake It! was a great, if strange, little adventure.
You’ll smash your way through levels, literally shake foes down like a crazed Marina from Mischief Makers, and race to the ends of levels against a rushing clock. Like most Wii games, it also utilized motion controls, though not to a huge extent. Still, it’s a fun and silly adventure for a lovable rogue.
8 No More Heroes III
POS Versus UFO
Let’s just be real — if we weren’t in direct control of his actions, most of us probably wouldn’t hang out with Travis Touchdown. He’s a sloppy mess, has a bunch of horrible habits, and he’s violent to boot.
Thankfully, that’s just the sort of whack job you need in the No More Heroes series. And in No More Heroes III, Travis isn’t just fighting against assassins and superpowered psychos. He’s dealing with an honest-to-goodness alien invasion!
When Travis isn’t slicing foes up with his Beam Katana, he’s using wrestling moves to smash them into the ground and even using the Death Glove to unleash teleportation dropkicks. And when he’s not saving the day, he’s finding any way he can make money and dreaming about unsavory things.
Truly, he’s the hero we deserve, if not the one we want.
7 MadWorld
Cayman Paints the Town Red
As someone who grew up with Nintendo and came to expect pretty tame fare from the company, imagine my surprise when I discovered MadWorld on the Wii.
Granted, that was when Nintendo started taking risks with mature games, but I really had no idea how wild MadWorld would be, nor how much I would love it. This brutal, black, white, and red adventure wasn’t just a fun romp, but one where unrelenting acts of violence are the coin of passage.
Jack Cayman is definitely not a good guy, but he’s the sort of person you want on your side during the apocalypse. In MadWorld, he navigates DeathWatch, a twisted reality TV show where you have to kill to progress, and the gorier the spectacle, the better.
When Jack isn’t stacking foes like cordwood and cutting them in half, he’s fighting against twisted bosses who can (and will) slice him to ribbons if you’re not careful.
6 Infamous 2
One Electric Badass
Cole MacGrath is a bit of a special case on this list. Yes, he’s a very mature hero, but he’s also one who can go either way thanks to Infamous 2’s Karma system. So, depending on how you act in the game, he can go full villain or be a bit more virtuous.
No matter which route you go, he’ll be racing around New Marais, grinding on rails, absorbing energy, and flinging it violently at his foes. Ultimately, his goal is to get strong enough to defeat the Beast, but it’ll take a while to get there.
While I personally find it more fun to be naughty in the game, the duality of the adventure is what holds Cole MacGrath back slightly on this list.
5 Devil May Cry 3: Dante’s Awakening
Dante’s Beginnings
Ever since the first Devil May Cry, fans have been captivated by the swagger and violence of Dante. But in Devil May Cry 3: Dante’s Awakening, we get to see how the demon-powered hunter came to be such a threat to all things supernatural.
The short version is, Dante’s brother Vergil has a large part to play, as does the tower Temen-ni-gru. What helps set Devil May Cry 3 apart from the other games, other than being a prequel, is how much control the player has over how Dante fights.
Your choice between Styles like Trickster, Swordmaster, Gunslinger, and Royal Guard plays a huge role in how Dante fights and grows in the adventure. Just be prepared, because this prequel is absolutely brutal, though you can always try the Special Edition for a bit more of a balanced affair.
4 Demon’s Crest
Firebrand’s Revenge
Were it strictly up to my own personal tastes, Firebrand would probably be sitting pretty at the top of this list. But since we’re trying to go according to overall reception, the demonic hero is here instead.
Regardless, Firebrand is an absolutely wonderful antihero in Demon’s Crest. He had just taken complete control over the Demon World at the beginning of the game, only to get backstabbed by the demon Phalanx. Worse, every demon in the realm calls the traitor a hero, which only enrages Firebrand further.
Not content to sit and wallow, Firebrand goes on a mission of vengeance. Over the course of the game, he’ll recover the stolen Crests, and with their power will finally become strong enough to end Phalanx permanently. And for those truly adventurous gamers, there’s an even more brutal boss hiding to challenge yourselves with.
3 Bayonetta 2
Witchy Business
It really says something that in a game with both angels and demons, the witch is somehow the bad girl. Bayonetta is absolutely driven and unrelenting, which is both a source of strength but also part of the reason she keeps getting into trouble in Bayonetta 2.
One thing Bayo shares with almost everyone on this list is the sin of pride, though thankfully, she backs it up with brutal witchy power.
The only thing holding Bayonetta back from a higher posting on this particular list is that, despite her tough exterior, she generally wants to do the good thing when it comes down to it.
2 God of War II
Death to the Gods
Though I realize God of War II is a bit of a deep cut, there’s a reason I included this and not one of Kratos’ later adventures. Put simply, after he has a child, in many ways, he becomes a better person. And for this list, we don’t want a well-rounded Kratos; we want the unhinged, god-killing monster.
While it’s true Kratos is vicious and bloody in his quest to upend the realm of the gods, there is a reason he’s so angry. The cruelty of the gods cost him everything. And instead of letting it destroy him, he uses his rage as fuel to accomplish unprecedented victories.
Kratos is a joy to play in God of War II, swinging the Blades of Athena with abandon, along with the Barbarian Hammer, Spear of Destiny, and the Blade of Olympus. No matter your preference, Kratos is a brutal killing machine and will put even the most legendary of monsters and heroes to rest.
1 The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt
Daddy Daughter Day is Brutal
Though many on this list would fall under the category of antihero, that’s not strictly true of Geralt of Rivia. But he’s also very much not a “nice guy”. He’s a gruff, consummate professional who makes his living killing monsters. Saving the day is just a happy afterthought.
In The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt, Geralt’s patience is tested by Ciri and the Wild Hunt itself, a seemingly never-ending supernatural threat. To keep Yennefer’s child safe, he’ll have to do some very unsavory and violent things.
Thankfully, the game itself is a joy to play, using powerful sword techniques and juggling magical Signs to ensorcell foes. And when he’s not cutting a bloody swathe through the realm, he’ll flirt and even spend some quality time in a sauna.
More than anything, Geralt is a fun character because he’s so versatile and nuanced. He’s definitely the hero we need in a supernatural world, but not someone I’d like to share a beer with.
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Author: 360 Technology Group
